Ask Dr. Mona

It can feel surprising to hear your child say they want to hurt someone, but at this age, it’s not about cruelty. Three-year-olds are still figuring out what emotions mean and how to manage them. When they lash out, it’s usually about power, frustration, or curiosity. They’re testing what happens when they act on a big feeling.

When this happens, your job is to stay calm and set a clear, firm boundary: “I won’t let you hit. Hitting hurts.” Then, keep everyone safe by creating a little space, like moving yourself or your younger child away. Try not to overreact or launch into a long talk in the moment. That kind of attention can accidentally fuel the behavior.

Once everyone’s calm, circle back: “You were really mad when your brother took your toy. Next time, you can say, ‘I don’t like that!’ or ask me for help.” This helps your toddler connect the dots between their feelings, words, and actions.

If he says he wants to hurt someone, it usually means he’s overwhelmed and doesn’t yet have the words to express it. That’s your cue to build emotional language: “You sound angry. When we feel angry, we can stomp our feet, take deep breaths, or squeeze a pillow, but we don’t hurt people.” Then, offer “yes” outlets for those big feelings, like jumping on a cushion or doing a silly dance.

And don’t forget to name and notice gentle moments: “You were so kind to your brother just now.” The more you point out calm and caring behavior, the more your child learns that connection, not chaos, gets your attention.

If you want more step-by-step examples of what to say in these moments (and how to stay consistent through all the ups and downs of toddlerhood), check out the PedsDocTalk Toddlers and Tantrums Course. It’s full of real-life scripts, mindset shifts, and boundary-setting tips that actually work.

You’re not alone in asking this. “Detox” has become a buzzword online, especially in parenting spaces. But here’s the truth: your child’s body already knows how to detox.

The liver, kidneys, and skin are constantly filtering and clearing out what the body doesn’t need. It’s one of the most efficient systems we have, and it doesn’t need extra help from powders, supplements, or special baths. For most kids, these detox products aren’t just unnecessary; they can actually be harmful. Because they’re not well-regulated, ingredients can vary wildly, and some can cause dehydration, diarrhea, or even interfere with how the body naturally processes waste.

These concerns often stem from fears about heavy metals in food or vaccine ingredients. But extensive research shows that trace amounts found in both are safe. Babies naturally take in more aluminum from breast milk or formula than they’ll ever receive from vaccines, and thimerosal, a mercury-based preservative, was removed from most vaccines decades ago, even though studies showed it was safe.

Real medical detox is reserved for serious situations, like confirmed lead poisoning, and it’s done under strict medical supervision. For everyone else, the most effective “detox” isn’t a cleanse, it’s the everyday habits that keep those organs working smoothly:

• Balanced diet: Offer a variety of fruits, vegetables, and whole grains to provide essential nutrients for the liver, kidney, and digestive system.

• Hydration: Keep your child well-hydrated. Water is nature’s natural detox drink!

• Physical activity: Regular exercise improves circulation and overall health.

• Good sleep: Quality sleep allows the body to repair and manage toxin removal

• Reduce environmental exposures: Maintain clean air at home by keeping vents clean and considering air filters, especially if your child has asthma or allergies

That’s it. No powders, no potions. Just real health habits that help your child’s natural systems do their job.

Still have questions? Watch this PedsDocTalk YouTube video for a clear breakdown of the facts, myths, and what really supports your child’s health.

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