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Finding Connection on Busy Days
PDT Real Talk
Mona Amin
February 23, 2025
Parenting is full of to-do lists, responsibilities, and nonstop movement. On the busiest days, finding time to connect with our children can feel like a challenge. It’s easy to end the day wondering, Did I even get a real moment with my child today?
The truth is, connection doesn’t have to be grand or time-consuming. But it still matters. Feeling connected helps children feel safe, loved, and secure. Just like us, kids have emotional “cups” that need to be filled. When they feel connected, they’re more likely to be patient, handle transitions better, and feel more secure–even when the day is busy. Beyond that, these small moments shape how they see themselves and their place in the world.
A simple hug, asking a thoughtful question, including them in a task, or a few minutes of undivided attention sends the message: You are important to me. When a child feels that their thoughts, feelings, and presence matter, it builds self-worth and a sense of belonging. Connection also fosters trust and cooperation–children who feel understood are more likely to engage and listen. And over time, these moments create emotional resilience, giving children the confidence to navigate challenges knowing they are supported.
But when life feels nonstop, it can be hard to find time for meaningful moments–especially when exhaustion kicks in. That’s why we asked you, our incredible community, to share how you make it work. This month, we asked:
This month, we asked:
“How do you connect with your child on a busy day?”
Your responses were thoughtful, reassuring, and full of simple but meaningful ways to make time–even when the day feels packed. From bedtime snuggles to quick dance parties, these little moments add up.
Before we dive in, we want to acknowledge that this question sparked a lot of reflection. Some responses are longer than usual, but we’re sharing them in full because they offer such relatable and thoughtful perspectives. We loved seeing the different ways parents make connection work, even on the busiest days.
Making the Most of Bedtime
For many families, bedtime is a guaranteed opportunity to wind down together. Whether it’s snuggling, talking about the day, reading books, or singing songs, those last moments before sleep create a sense of warmth and security. If bedtime feels hectic–which sometimes it does–try carving out just 5 extra minutes of focused, distraction-free time. Even a short cuddle or chat about the day can make a big difference in how connected children feel.
“I work a lot, but bedtime in our house is sacred. No matter what is going on, when it's my night for bedtime (mom and dad alternate), I do not let it be rushed by work or other stresses. We do our whole routine, which ends with snuggles and songs in the armchair before crib time, and I never truncate that - I just sit back and enjoy the snuggles and conversation and cherish the moments we can slow down and savor!”
“Bedtime snuggles talking about our day and bed sharing.”
“We read books on the couch every night before bed. After she brushes her teeth, I still hold her and rock her in her rocking chair for ~5 minutes. She's 4, but sometimes when she's super tired she still falls asleep in my arms and I just really relish those moments when it's calm and quiet, and she finds comfort in my arms. When she's not too tired, she asks for me to sing a song or she tells me something spontaneous, and that shows me she really loves our time connecting, and I do too!”
Mealtime Conversations Matter
Shared meals, even quick ones, offer a chance to pause, reconnect, and listen. Many parents use dinner as a daily check-in, asking specific questions to spark conversation. If mealtimes are busy, even a 5-minute breakfast together or a quick snack chat in the car can build connection.
“At dinner we ask, “what was the best part of your day?” My 2 year old loves it and sometimes we’ll go around the table 3 or 4 times!”
“We always share meal times together. And at dinner time, I always ask about what we’ve done during the day. Helps us both reflect on the day which brings back the connection aspect.”
“My work schedule is a bit all over during the week. I work while the kids are in school/daycare and start back up 6-9 after dinner. I’ve had to get creative with the little time which means eating together is non negotiable even if someone isn’t hungry. We sit together for ten mins and ask questions like “who did you eat with at lunch.” I also commit to something like one game of horse. I know it won’t take too long so I can complete other tasks while also fitting in the time to connect.”
“Have breakfast 1:1 to start the day together!”
“When I pick her up from daycare she sits in the back of the car, eats a snack, and we chat…”
Intentional One-on-One Moments
On busy days, short but focused one-on-one time can be powerful. Parents shared that even just 5-10 minutes of undivided attention helps their child feel seen. Even in the busiest moments, showing genuine excitement when reconnecting with your child– whether it’s setting a timer for 5 minutes of uninterrupted play, creating a small ritual like a weekly “s’mores Friday,” or making time for a quick game before tackling chores–can make a big difference.
“If my daughter wants to play but I need to get chores done, I promise to play for 5 minutes first. I set a timer and we do whatever she wants to do together without any distractions. When the timer goes off, she usually feels content & continues playing by herself while I start doing what I needed to do without the fighting.”
“I’d been thinking about this question a lot the past few weeks. We have a 7-year old and now 4-month old and have had to give our newest little family member more attention. Between the feedings, naps, and issues with GERD, my 7-year old daughter was feeling left out at times and not getting the one on one attention she had for the last 7 years. This was both heartbreaking and a tough change to adjust to for all of us. I needed a change that was quick and easy to implement incase I was taking care of the baby. Recently, we’ve started a “s’mores Friday” where we make microwave s’mores (one small graham cracker square a person) and talk about the best and least favorite parts of our day. My daughter looks forward to this every Friday and it’s become an easy way to connect with her and talk about her day.”
“Even on busy days I find i can take 5-10 minutes of "special time" where I put my phone away and focus solely on him. We get to do anything he wants and I always make a point of calling it our special one on one time. It makes a big difference!”
“Ask what she learned, what made her happy/sad, and/or focus on a small increment of time to play with just her (5-10 minutes). I always preface it by saying we have X time to play with just you and I’m so excited! After that I have to do XYZ, but now let’s play! When the timer is over I always say how much fun I had, how I have to do XYZ, and I can’t wait to play again.”
Turning Daily Routines into Connection Points
Connection doesn’t always have to be carved out separately–it can happen in the small, everyday moments that are already built into our routines. Many parents found creative ways to weave connection into the tasks they’re already doing, turning routine moments into opportunities for bonding. The key takeaway? Connection doesn’t have to mean stopping everything–it can be part of what you’re already doing.
“Have them hang out with me while I cook. Dance our way to the bathroom to brush teeth etc. In between the juggling tasks give them a kiss and a hug and tell them I love them and I’m so happy to see them :)”
“Both husband and I are medical residents, which makes our lives hectic. We still try to do the night routine together everyday (unless one of us is on call). We do dinner, 15 min of dancing/playing an instrument, then bath, bedtime story/praying. All together we “lose” almost 1 and a half to 2 hours of studying/working, but we did agree before having children that quality together time is a must.”
“This was tough to think about but it did make me feel better as a parent. I’m always riddled with mom guilt about not having enough time but this question made me realize, I do connect with them daily. It may only be for a few minutes some days. I have 3 children (twin 9 year old boys and 3 year old boy) so I connect differently for each. My first twin, I talk with about his day while I am making dinner. He typically sits at the counter or will pitch in as cooking is a big interest of his. My second twin, who is less of a talker, reads with me. My toddler, we cuddle up in bed before he goes to sleep. He enjoys talking and having his head rubbed.”
Movement and Play Bring Us Together
Many of you shared how playful moments help shake off stress and reconnect–whether it’s roughhousing, dancing, or playing a quick game. Movement is a great way to release energy, laugh, and feel close, even on the busiest days.
“For my three year old, having a pre dinner 2 song dance party is one form of connection we have. We put in fun wigs and just shake it for a couple of songs before we sit down to eat :)”
“We have smoothies every weekday before daycare drop-off because she misses their breakfast. I let her pick songs to play on our kitchen speaker while we enjoy them. Raffi joins us often!”
“It depends on the child, but for my toddler son, I like to roughhouse with him. That usually involves him running away from me while I grab him. It's so fun!”
The Little Moments Add Up
Reading through your responses, one theme stood out: connection doesn’t have to be complicated. Even on the busiest days, small, intentional moments mean something to our children–and to us!
Connection isn’t just for kids–it helps us as parents, too. Taking even a few moments to slow down and engage with our children can ease our own stress, boost our mood, and remind us why these little moments matter. When we feel connected to our children, we’re more patient, more present, and more attuned to their needs. It’s easy to get caught up in everything that needs to get done, but these moments of connection help ground us just as much as they do our children.
And as many of you pointed out, connection looks different for every child and family. Some children love conversation, others connect through play. Some need physical affection, while others want space. The key is figuring out what works best for your child and embracing the small ways you can show up for them–even when time is limited.
Thank you to everyone who shared their experiences and tips! We hope these ideas inspire you to find simple ways to stay connected, even in the chaos of life. The winner of this month’s giveaway has been notified via email, and we’ll have another Real Talk question for you with a chance to win a PedsDocTalk course in March.
We’d love to hear from you! If you didn’t get a chance to share your response this time, you can still join the conversation. Visit our new community library and drop a comment about the small ways you connect with your child—even on the busiest days. Your experiences might inspire another parent who needs a little reassurance!
Thank you for being part of our incredible community ❤️
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On YouTube
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On The Podcast
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